Friday, January 29, 2010

Email of the Day

One of my friends just emailed me the link to this video. Her sister works for Channel 12 News in Milwaukee, and ran this story, which was later picked up by other news channels. Apparently, Channel 9 here in Chicago ran it yesterday. Check out this video, it's awesome!!

Click here for the news story. These kids are hoping to hit a million hits on YouTube, so please, spread the word!!

There. I did it.

I finally updated that damn ticker. Not as bad as I thought, but still disappointing. More later.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Email of the Day

This one is especially for Smileygirl. Enjoy!!


Wednesday, January 27, 2010

"Um...I meant...."

Suddenly, Table 2 erupts into a cacophony of "ooohhh"s and "oooooo"s and "I'm tellin'!!"

Me: WHAT is going on!?

Table 2 (in unison!): M is cursing!!

Me: M, I hope that's not true.

M: (wildly shaking head)Uh, no, no! I, um, I just, um, I meant to say 'bitch.' (He then proceeds to shake his head, kinda like when you clear an Etch-A-Sketch) Um...yeah...(then he just kinda looks at me, defeated)

This all happened as we were preparing for dismissal. So after helping 32 babies put on and zipper their coats, tie their scarves, put on their gloves/mittens and hats, put on their boots....wait, where the hell was I going with this? Oh, yeah, after helping them all get ready, we started lining up, and I pulled M to the side for a second. "Were you trying to say 'pinch'?" "YES!" The look on his face was priceless!

OK, so New Principal never had anyone come to cover my class so we could talk about The Great Divide (as I keep referring to it as) so nothing was done today. I have a sinking feeling that the lists are just going to be made without my input. The plan, from what I understood, was to make the lists today, so that letters can go home tomorrow, and the 'new' classes can start Monday. (There is no school for students on Friday, because it's a professional development day.) Now, I have no idea how she plans to inform the parents of the switch.

I mentioned the possibility of children being taken out of my room in my newsletter last week, and again this week, so the parents wouldn't be caught by surprise when the switch happens. I had two parents come to me on Tuesday, demanding that their children NOT be moved out of my room. The one mom was pretty funny. She told me she planned to "march right into that office and tell them that I will pull A out of this school if he is moved out of your room!" I gotta tell ya, this is the same mother who pissed me off royaly when school started because she kept her son home on his birthday because she couldn't have a party in class. She did a few other things to bug my ass in the beginning of the year, however, over the past few months, we've come to an understanding. She actually wrote me a lovely thank you card at Christmas time to go with the pretty earrings that her son gave me. (She told me he bought them with his own money. Too cute!!) Anyway, I wish I had been a fly on the wall when she went in there!

I hope I have something to share with you tomorrow about The Great Divide. Friday, like I said, we have a professional development day. Unfortunately, I have to attend a workshop, along with about 20 coworkers, at the Double Tree Hotel in a suburb that's about 45 minutes from my house. I actually would rather be at school since I have lots of work to do. Report cards are due by tomorrow, and I'm not quite finished. I've been a DIBELing fool since we came back from break, and after doing my own kids, I had to do the kindergartners that are in the K/1 split class. I really don't want to start a full-on rant about this, but let me just say, that teacher had the balls to send me TEN kids to DIBEL today, during our rest time, which is when I DIBEL my own kids. I had planned to work on report cards today, since my kids have all been tested, but obviously, that didn't happen. Once again, I don't have a prep tomorrow, so I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to get them all done. In the ever-abundant wisdom on CPS, you can not access the system we use for report cards from home. They all have to be done at school. Have you ever heard of anything so stupid? I feel a rant coming, so I'm going to move on.

I need to get going anyway, since the groomer just called, and Buster is ready to be picked up from his Spa Day. I need to go straight from the groomer to my girlfriend's salon, for my own beautification project. I have a feeling Buster is on the winning end of this one! ;-)

Tuesday, January 26, 2010


This was so much fun!! These pictures are from yesterday's math lesson. We, obviously, made shapes with our bodies. We made lots of shapes, so that everyone had several turns, and so that we could practice before I took pictures. I wish I had stood on a table to get a better angle. I'm sure the babies will indulge me and do it again if I ask. :) Don't you just LOVE my carpet. I LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT!! I got it through one of my Donors Choose grants. I've been thinking about doing another one, so be on the look out for shameless begging in the near future!

Shhhh...I may have some exciting news for you tomorrow. I've been keeping a lid on this, because I wasn't really sure what was going to happen, but now I'm fairly certain that we will FINALLY be getting another kdg. teacher, and that my class will be split again. If all goes as planned, I will drop down to about 22-23 kids. But, I don't want to jinx things, so that's all I'm going to say for now. Please send good thoughts and/or prayers!!

The 800 pound gorilla in the room...

...or on this page?

For months, I've ignored the ticker at the top of this page. You know the one. The one I so proudly used to show my weight loss. The weight I started losing while on summer vacation. Like the ticker says, I haven't updated in over 80 days. The last time to be exact was Halloween. October 31, 2009. That's pitiful. Just pitiful. Although I hadn't lost any weight since then, I was able to maintain those 25 pounds for quite some time, despite not doing the things I did to lose them. For example, I can't even remember the last time I stepped on my Wii Fit board, or did an exercise routine. I did still watch my diet, and was drinking gallons of green tea.

Right up until Stud's birthday, I was doing well. I was maintaining. Then, his birthday weekend was the first time I let myself fall off the "no carb" wagon. But, hey, it was the 16th anniversary of the day I thought I was going to die, so I felt entitled to a little treat. (Don't you love how I can rationalize everything!? That's pretty much how I got myself to point I am today.) I didn't go nuts, but it opened that dangerous door. Right around the corner from his birthday was Thanksgiving. Again, I didn't go nuts, but I ate things I knew I shouldn't have. I blinked and it was Christmas. Now, I almost never deny myself on Christmas because nearly all the food we eat on Christmas Eve, as part of our very traditional Big Fat Italian Christmas, is food we only eat once a year. If you don't eat it then, you're out of luck til next Christmas! But, just like on Thanksgiving, I didn't go nuts. Just a few bites of everything. I was happy. And, miraculously, I was still maintaining.

Somewhere between Christmas and now, I lost it. As long as I left my ticker alone, I didn't have to acknowledge my failure. Then, one day I opened up this page, and right there in big red letters - not updated for more than 80 day. Please update. Just in case you need that translated, it said, "Hey, loser, get off your enormous ass and do something!!"

So, I'm starting with this. I figured if I publicly acknowledged my "slip," I would feel compelled to do something about it. Stud had said, right before the holidays, that he wanted to 'go back on his diet.' His big loser of a mother convinced him that he might as well wait until the holidays were over. What kind of a bitch throws her own kid under the bus just to make herself feel less guilty about being a fat pig?! Ugh!

When we were looking at the pictures from the Mother/Son Dance, my little baby looked at one of the pictures, and yelled out, "Oh my God!! I look huge!!" It kinda broke my heart. Now, he's really determined to get back on track. It's me that's the problem. But, enough is enough. I have GOT to do this, both for myself AND my son. I've set a horrible example for him the past 16 years, and it has to stop.

Yet, even as I'm typing this, I'm eating tonight's dinner of...rice pudding. Yes, rice-freakin-pudding! Oh, and of course, Biggest Loser is on the TV, cuz I always eat while I watch this show!! Stud went with his dad this afternoon, and it just doesn't seem worth cooking for just myself, hence the rice pudding. Do I know this is insane? Hell, yes!! Am I back to that place where I would never think to do that? Obviously not. When I'm "in the zone," it would never enter my mind to have such a shitty dinner. I would take the time to make something for dinner, usually a big salad with lots of healthy add-ins, like tomatoes, olives, red/orange/yellow peppers, avocados, maybe some grilled chicken, goat cheese, etc. Wow, that sounds really good...too bad I didn't take the time to make THAT for dinner. One of my favorite things to take for lunch is a salad with roast beef (that I roll up, then rip into chunks) and bleu cheese, tomatoes and olives. Yum! I think I'm going to make that for tomorrow's lunch. Maybe it'll be easier than I thought to get 'back in the zone.'

Tomorrow morning, I will be weighing myself, and updating that ticker. Wish me luck. And, keep me in check, my Bloggy Buddies!! If I don't update for a while, call me out on it! Embarrass me. Do whatever it takes to make me accountable. I know you'll be doing it out of love.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

How is it only Thursday?!

This is pretty much the message I got from the Universe yesterday! Thanks, Pissed Off, for this laugh. Why is that every time we have a Monday off, the rest of the week just drags on and on?

And, the warm, fuzzy feelings just keep going. Today was not much better than yesterday, except that there were 5 kids out, so that was a little better. But, my two little trouble makers from yesterday were both there, so I had my fair share of stress today. They ALL were a little nuts today. Even Ms. H. had it with them today. She said, due to their behavior yesterday, she was going to make them have silent lunch today. I made a point of walking all the way into the lunchroom with them, and reminded each and every one of them that it was to be a SILENT lunch period. I left them with Ms. H., as usual, and thought they understood. Well, when Ms. H. brought them back, she was beside herself. Long story short, I told them they would be having silent lunch again tomorrow, and that I will be sitting with them. So much for getting a break tomorrow....

I woke up in the middle of the night last night because I couldn't breathe. All day today, my sinuses have been doing that delightful little dance that goes, "Stuffy nose, runny nose, stuffy nose, runny nose, 1, 2, blow, blow, blow, 3, 4, breathe through your mouth..." You get the picture. So, in addition to dealing with my little darlings and their poor behavior, I was dealing with my nose issues and a head that felt like it was literally going to explode. Oh, and don't forget the friggin' 8th grader I got to babysit all damn day!!

Thank God tomorrow is Friday. I was really tempted to stick around after school and prepare a sub folder, and just take tomorrow off. I'm sure this is just the beginning of my misery with this cold, and it would probably serve me well to have a whole day to stay in bed and rest tomorrow. But, I just couldn't bear to stay long enough to put the folder together, plus it's just more a hassle than it's worth to take a day off. Besides the time it takes to prepare the folder, 95% of the time, the sub ignores the damn folder, and doesn't do anything I spell out in my lesson plans. Plus, they usually let the kids run wild and destroy my room. On top of all that, Ms. H. doesn't work on Fridays, so the sub would be alone, which spells certain disaster for my classroom. If Ms. H. was going to be there, I just may have taken a sick day. I guess I'll just have to suck it up. And, no, I'm not referring to the snot running down my face.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Warning - This post may contain an F-bomb or two...

I haven't bitched about the Hell-Hole in a while, but there's some crap bubbling up right now that I need to spew, in hopes that my eye will stop fucking twitching!!!!!

First of all, did I mention I'm back up to 32 fucking kids?!? It was 33 for a day, until I realized that one of the new kids was actually supposed to be in 1st grade. Guess it was too fucking hard for the office to figure that out when they made a copy of her fucking birth certificate, huh? Thankfully, I've had, on average, at least 6 kids absent every day since we came back from break, so I've been able to squeeze them in at the tables. Today, however, all but 2 showed up, so I had to break down and set up a 5th table.

Latina Girl is lucky she didn't go home with my foot protruding from her ass today!! I tried to call her mother several times, so she could come get her, but of course, I couldn't reach her. God forbid there had been a real emergency! (You know, like needing a foot surgically removed from her rectum!) The final straw, that made me call her mom, was when she stole something from one of my little darlings. Two tables of babies displayed some wonderful behavior right before lunch, and each of those babies was given a treat to eat when they finished their lunch. Well, Latina Girl took one of the other girl's treats right off her plate and ate it!!! And THEN, she tried to say she didn't know it wasn't hers!! WTF?!? I wanted to punch her in her face!

Besides Latina Girl pissing me off all day, AM was really pushing my buttons, as well. (How do I NOT have a label for this PITA on this blog? It's not possible that I haven't bitched about her yet! Oh, well, there's a first time for everything, right?) She has been a HUGE PITA since the very first day of school. When her mother brought her to school this morning, she came to me and asked if I would send a note home at the end of the day to let her know what kind of day she had. Apparently, it's AM's little brother's birthday today, and if she had a bad day, she wasn't going to be able to go out to celebrate tonight. Well, of course, I figured I would sugar-coat the report so she wouldn't miss the party. Yeah, well, that lasted about 20 minutes!! Between her and Latina Girl, I don't know who was making my blood boil more. (When her mom came to get her at the end of the day, I didn't sugar coat a damn thing. Then mom tells me that she already was having a bad day before she came to school. I guess she shoved her baby brother - the birthday boy!- off the bed this morning. But, apparently Mom wanted to make ME the bad guy, cuz she didn't have the backbone to just tell her she was going to have to miss the celebration. Her mother's shitty parenting is exactly why this child acts the way she does!!!)

When we were coming back from our afternoon bathroom break, Ms. H saw us in the hall and asked if I wanted her to take a couple of them off my hands for a while (since I had 30 freakin' kids by myself all damn day!!) I didn't even have to say anything, she knew which two to take! About 15 minutes later, she comes to the room with the two brats, and says that New Principal said they had to come back to the room. WTF??! She said they couldn't be out of the room missing instruction. Yeah, well, when they're IN the room, there's very little instruction going on, because I spend all my fuckin' time dealing with their bullshit!! ARGH!!!! In the short time they were gone, we were able to do an awesome lesson about graphs that was tons of fun, and had the rest of the babies on the edge of their seats. Whatever! I put them in opposite corners, and tried to just trudge on with the day.

I was seething, though, on the inside about New Principal, and the stupid statement she made about them missing instruction. I haven't bitched about this yet, but there's no time like the present, right? Almost every fuckin' day, I have at least one 8th grader sent to my room, so that I can babysit. And 99% of the time, these kids have been kicked out of their rooms for being out of uniform. Seriously?!? Not because they were disrespectful, or disruptive, or any kind of discipline problem. No, they have on jeans!! Have you ever heard anything so fucking ridiculous?

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm glad she's actually enforcing the uniform policy. That's always been a HUGE problem at the Hell-Hole. So, yes, please enforce it. However, how does she justify making an 8th grade student, who is supposed to graduate in June, miss an entire day of instruction?! Make these kids stay after school for detention, or come in early for morning detention, or some other appropriate consequence. DO NOT keep them out of class for a whole day. And DON'T make ME babysit them!!!! She's under the delusion that it embarrasses them to have to sit in kindergarten. Yeah, right!! They love it. And, it's one more body I have to be responsible for, one more kid I have to keep busy all day. The day I was out for Bestest Friend's mom's funeral, there were THREE of them sent to my room. Apparently, the sub paid them no mind, and they played with my computers, messed up my games, rearranged my books, ugh!!!!!!

Did it ever occur to New Principal that these kids purposely come to school out of uniform so they WON'T have to go to class? DUH! These kids aren't stupid, ya know!

Ugh, I could go on and on, and I definitely have more to bitch about, but I'm going to stop for tonight. I'm going to make myself a yummy cup of hot cocoa (sugar-free Swiss Miss with a shot of sugar-free hazelnut syrup. YUMMY!) and curl up on the couch. I'm sure there's some mindless TV I can watch for a while to lower my blood pressure. Man, I wish Glee was on...oh, wait! I just remembered it's Wednesday, and I love the line-up on ABC! Modern Family is one of the most hilarious shows on right now. I love it! The Middle has some pretty funny moments, and I love Cougar Town. Then, one of my all-time favorites, Ugly Betty, has just moved to Wednesday, so that'll round out my evening of mindless TV. Yay! Good thing Stud went with CSJ, otherwise I'm sure I'd be ignoring him tonight. Oh, wait, isn't that what teenagers WANT their parents to do?

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Email of the Day

So much for Weight Watchers:

Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Walmart, for our
dogs. I was about to check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think, that I had an elephant?

Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't
have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I
probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the
bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive
care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body and IVs in both

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I
was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically
everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
had poisoned me.

I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking lot to lick my ass
and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.

Thanks, Bestest Friend! This one made my day!

Date Night!

I didn’t take any pictures at dinner. Probably because I was so irritated by the place we went. We had 5:30 reservations, but we weren’t given a damn table until 6:20! Now, I love Chi Tung, and I know they’re always BUSY, but we tried to plan ahead here. First off, we actually made a reservation!! And, we made it much earlier than we thought we needed it, just in case it was a little busy. But, come on! 50 minutes behind in seating?! That’s just ridiculous.

Like I said, we sat in their new hibachi grill section. Things did not progress smoothly from there. I really didn’t want this to be one of my usually bitchy posts (because I really did have a wonderful night!) so suffice it to say, we ended up with a $50 credit toward our bill after speaking to the manager. And, the boys had a great time, despite how cranky their moms were getting.

Here’s The Crew. Naturally, my own child is the only one not looking at me! Oy!


As soon as we arrived, we got in line to take our “professional” picture. We did it last year, too, but now I have no idea where it is. :( This year, because it was the 25th Anniversary of the Mother/Son Dance at Stud’s school, each mom was given a pretty silver frame to put the picture in, which was a delightful surprise! Too bad the picture looks like CRAP!!! I think I just may have to blow-up on of the less-nasty pictures we took ourselves at the dance and put that in the frame.

We had already been dancing for a while here, hence the shiny/sweaty mess, but this is probably the only half-way decent picture of us from the night. And, Stud isn’t really smiling. Ok, so it’s the only half-way decent picture of ME!HPIM2964

Not sure what the boys were going for here. Stud said that he and his Bestest Buddy (the one on his left) were making their “vampire faces.” Don’t ask…I don’t get it either.HPIM2971

Stud Muffin was really bustin’ a move here. Not exactly sure what move, but it’s a move….HPIM2995

The requisite Dip, done at every dance! I wish I could have videoed all the dancing that lead up to this dip!!HPIM3002

The dance was scheduled from 7:30-10:30, but whoever planned the bowling thing scheduled it from 10-12. (huh!?) So, about 10:10ish, we were trying to figure out if we should leave early and head over to the bowling thing. Well, when I asked Stud if he was ready to go, he said, “Aw, I just requested a song.” So, we decided to wait until the DJ played it. Ok, cool, we all went out and danced some more. A couple of songs played, and each time a new song started, the boys all stood in eager anticipation of Stud’s song. But, he kept saying, “No, that’s not it.” So I asked him what song he requested, but he said it was a surprise. Then Bestest Buddy’s mom asked if it was a song for the boys, and Stud said no, and tried to “secretly” point to me. Well, then they decided we really had to stay until the end.

Suddenly, Brown Eyed Girl started playing, and I, of course, started gushing, thinking that was the song. (CSJ always would request it for me, and/or sing it to me back in the day.) But, when I started to thank Stud, he said it wasn’t the song. Hmmm…now I was really curious as to what the song was. We just kept dancing. A couple of other songs played, and just when we were about to call it quits, I heard it. It was like “Name That Tune.” As soon as I heard the first 2 beats, I knew. My baby had requested one of my ALL TIME favorite songs….Superstition! I LOVE that song!! It was so cute! I really, really was touched. It was absolutely the highlight of my entire evening. Then we danced our behinds off. Again, I wish I had video. Stud kept spinning me around like a top. I seriously thought I was going to pass out! Here’s a little taste…HPIM3032

As we were getting our coats to leave, after “my song” of course, the DJ started playing a merengue. Let me say it one more time…I wish I could have videoed this!! Watching these 4 try to merengue had me on the floor!HPIM3040 HPIM3041 HPIM3042

Then, the other 3 and their moms left to head over to the bowling alley, and Stud wanted to stay and dance with me. How cute is he!!? When he was very young, I taught him to salsa, along with a few other Latin dances I learned while taking lessons at a studio downtown. He always loved it. As a matter of fact, at some school party when he was, I think, in the 3rd grade, he taught his principal and some of his teachers to salsa. How funny is that?

The evening was kinda sandwiched in cluster-fucky-ness, we realized, once we got to the bowling alley. I still don’t want this to turn into a bitchfest, so I’ll just say the event was NOT organized very well, and the pizza that was promised on the sign-up sheet was not to be had. The boys were fine with it, especially since we had less than an hour to bowl two games (we ended up only getting about 2 frames into the second game) and they still had a great time.HPIM3044 HPIM3047

After bowling, I invited the whole gang back to our house, but the moms were tired (it was past midnight, after all) so everyone just left. Stud and I stopped for gas, then went to our favorite 24 hour Greek restaurant and had some breakfast. By the time we walked in the door, it was about a quarter to 2 in the morning, and yet, I still felt like this:HPIM3061

It was a wonderful evening! I can’t wait to do it again next year!

*Just for shits and giggles, here's my favorite Stevie Wonder song evah! You're welcome! :)

**In case you have no life, or are suffering from insomnia and need a cure, here's the link to the whole album of photos.

Oh, what a night....

It's just after 2 am, and we're just getting home for our "date night." I'm far too exhausted to write a proper post, but I promise to do it tomorrow. I just had to tell the world that...


Saturday, January 16, 2010

One great weekend, coming up!

Like many people, we will be enjoying a long weekend this weekend. (Happy Birthday, Dr. King!) Unlike most weekends, when I just sit around in my pajamas from the time I walk in the door afterschool on Friday until I have to go back to work on Monday, I have a pretty full schedule this weekend.

Last night, Stud had one of his very bestest friends over, who was able to spend the night. I'm listening to them down in the basement right now, playing Wii. They're pretty funny. The very best part of having his friend over? Stud was up before 9 am!!!! Oh, NO, I'm NOT kidding!!!

I have no clue what time they went to bed. I passed out on the couch at 10, which really kinds sucks because I was attempting to watch a movie. Yeah, right! Like that'll ever happen! The minute the opening credits start, it's always like someone shot me with a tranquilizer gun! Every freakin' time!! Sheesh, it sucks being old! Anyway, I was up about 7 (I woke up on the couch around midnight, then watched a couple hours of TV until I could fall asleep again), did a quick check for the boys (Stud actually came upstairs and slept in his bed, his friend slept in the basement) then did some laundry. Around 8:15ish, I heard his friend moving around downstairs. He came up around 8:45, and I sent him right in to wake up Stud. Unbelievably, Stud got right up! Naturally, if it had been ME trying to wake him up, there would have been LOTS of yelling, but whatever, at least he's up! I'm a little concerned, though, that he may need to take a nap to survive the rest of the day because...

Here's a quick look at our Saturday night in pictures:
Japanese Restaurant
Dancing Couple
Pizza Parlor 2

Yay! Tonight is the Mother/Son Dance! I'm really excited. We had such a great time last year. This year, we're going with the same little group. (Two of Stud's besties, and their moms) We are going to one of our favorite restaurants, Chi Tung, for dinner before the dance. They recently opened a new hibachi grill section of the restaurant, and that's where we'll be dining. The boys are really excited to check it out, as are the moms! From there, we're headed to school for the dance. Last year, we had such a blast. After the dance, we will be going for bowling and pizza at a local bowling alley. Whew! I'm getting tired just thinking about it. Maybe Stud and I will BOTH need to take a nap later.

Tomorrow Stud is having friends over, since there's no school on Monday. Then, on Monday, we're both having friends over. He's got a bunch of kids coming over to hang out, and I'll be hosting a few friends from school and a few of my grad school friends. My grad school friends and I have tried to get together at least once a month since we graduated (sheesh, that's almost three years ago now!!) and we were doing very well right up until school started this year. I don't think we've seen each other in about 3 (long) months. The girls from school also decided we should try to get together for dinner once a month, but the last time we got together was when we had Mrs. F.'s baby shower. So, I thought I would combine my two groups of friends, and see what happens. I guarantee it'll be a laughfest. Especially if I bust out the martinis.... ;-)

It's taken me over an hour to finish this, and it's nearly noon. Maybe I should feed these boys, huh? I'll have to come back later because I actually did have some school stuff to write about. Remember, the actual reason for this blog? Yeah......

Do you know about this?

Thanks to Tiffany, I've found my Saturday morning obsession. I've already been reading for over an hour. Thought I'd take a break to share it with you. Although, I'm sure I'm probably one of the last to know about this site!

It's called, and it's basically all news stories of crazy and outrageous things that happen at schools, with students, teachers, principals, etc. I've added it to my blogroll, since I'm sure I'll be obsessed with it for a while.

Friday, January 15, 2010

And the Assbag of the Day Award goes to....

Ron Huberman, our CEO here in ChiTown. Check this out.

And yet, I can't get copies made cuz we don't have a copy machine that works. Hell, I can't even get PAPER!! We don't have enough books, we don't have working computers, oh, holy hell, I'm stopping this rant right here!!!!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

The cherry's been popped....

I have FINALLY watched an episode of American Idol. Oh, trust me, I'm not bragging, it's not something I'm proud of, it just is. I had my sister, nieces and parents over for dinner tonight, and one of the conditions for my niece to come was that she got to watch the AI premier. The rest of my family knows I want nothing to do with this show, so she HAD to make sure she could still watch at my house. Kinda funny, no?

OK, so I didn't die, my eyes didn't fall out of my head, my ears didn't seal up (although, more than once I wished they would have!!) and I'm obviously here to write about it. However, I highly doubt I will be watching again. Yes, I laughed, it wasn't horrible, it just wasn't my thing. PLUS, I'm really pissed that I missed tonight's episode of Biggest Loser. THAT'S what I watch while the rest of those goofballs are watching AI. I'm hoping NBC lets you watch their shows online like ABC does, because I'm going to try and watch tomorrow.

One of the reasons my parents agreed to come over for dinner was because my dad had my car. We switched cars last night so he could drive mine today, then take it to his buddy's place and have a remote starter put on it while he was working. He had done the same for my last car. Most people have that feature so they can warm up their cars in the winter. Yes, I do that sometimes, but I mostly use MINE in the summer, so that the air will run for a while before I get in. There is NOTHING I hate more than getting into a stifling hot car. I just can't breathe! So, I start mine in the summer to cool it off. Bottom line - Thank You, Daddy!!

A couple of funnies from today's episode of "Let's Test Our Babies to Death!!"
Given word - which (which every single baby hears as "witch!")
Sentence - "They ride around on mops!!"

Another one of my babies REALLY cracked me up today, and it was exactly what I needed at that moment because I was completely about to snap. While testing this particular little one, I was getting more and more annoyed with him because he just wasn't paying attention and/or trying his best. I knew he knew the things I was asking him, but he was more interested in watching the Between the Lions video playing (yes, I know, I need to find a better way to get the testing done other than putting the TV on!) than focusing on the task at hand. We were on the test where the child has to break words into phonemes (essentially 'sounds'). For example, if the given word is "mop," they need to tell me "mmmm. oooo. p." OK, so anyway, we had done about 4 or 5 words so far, and he was simply repeating the words instead of breaking them into sounds, and I was becoming exasperated. The next word was "by." When said it to him, he immediately turned around and walked away! He obviously thought I was saying "bye" as in, "I'm SO done with you! Bu-bye!" Poor baby! I just burst out laughing, which completely confused him, but it was exactly the tension reliever I needed in order to finish today's testing.

Wow, I just realized how late it is, and I still have some cleaning up to do in the basement from dinner. Time get off this damn computer. Nighty night.... :)

Saturday, January 9, 2010

I'm a thief...

I totally just stole this from Happy Wife, Happy Life. The whole time I was watching, I just kept thinking it was a joke, or an SNL skit. Enjoy!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Wow, what a day!

I had a whopping 14 kids come to school today! Woo hoo! It was such a great day. Then, one went home early at about noon, so I finished the day with 13. That's how many I had out yesterday!

I wish I could say that I made productive use of this small class size, and that we did lots of intensive one-on-one lessons, but truthfully, we did a whole lot of nuthin'! The babies got to take out the "computers" in the morning. Since there were so few kids, everyone got their own, and they were delighted about that! While the babies played on the computers, I organized and prepared a sub folder for Monday. I'll be out for Bestest Friend's mother's funeral. I essentially retyped 3 pages of sub plans, then copied worksheets, put together some extra coloring books (in case a time filler is needed) and left everything the sub will need in one place. Then, I typed out the newsletter and made the homework packets for next week. All the sub has to do is pass them out at the end of the day. Why do I have a sinking feeling that the packets will be right where I left them when I come in on Tuesday? I hope to God Ms. H. comes in to help the sub. I told her yesterday that I would be out on Monday. In the past, I had an assistant who took off almost every time I said I was going to be out! Or, if she came (which sometimes she did because then she'd be in charge for the day, as Big Cheese didn't always get a sub for my babies - yeesh, don't get me started....)she would then ALWAYS take the next day off. In some twisted way, she was getting even with me for being out. Bizarre, right? Anyway, I just hope Ms. H. doesn't decide to stay home, because she'll be a tremendous help to the sub.

I jotted down just a couple of funnies from this weeks DIBELing. They're not that hilarious, but they made me smile. The words in italics are the given words, the rest is the sentence they gave. The first three are all from the same little angel. He was cracking me up because he wanted to give the definition for each word instead of using the word in a sentence. But, he was so animated in his explanations, I couldn't help but crack up!

nobody-that means when people are invisible and you can't see 'em!
coach-that's a part of football, soccer, basketball.....oh, and baseball!
path-that means you when you follow a map!
coach-that means football, soccer-ball....

OK, time to finish the dishes. Stud has a friend over, and I need to take them to school in a bit for a basketball game. I'm so glad Stud's friends actually participate in social events at school, because he never would on his own. One of his best friends spent the entire ride home today begging him to come to the game. By the time we dropped him off, he had Stud convinced. Then, as we were driving home, he called to say he couldn't go himself! WTF? But, by then, Stud has already called another friend to see if he wanted to go, too, and now that's the friend who's here. I'm just glad he's hanging out with his friends. I kinda wish they'd decide to skip the game and just hang out here, just because I selfishly don't want to have to go back out tonight. Twice, since I'll have to pick them up. :( The temperature is supposed to take a serious nosedive tonight, with below-zero readings. And, that's withOUT the windchill factor. Yikes! That's a little chilly, even for ME!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Prayers requested...

My Bestest Friend lost her mom this morning. If you're a prayer, please say one for her and her family. Despite the fact that her mom has been ill for a while, her death was a shock, nonetheless.

We are having quite a snowstorm here today. I had 13 babies out today. Sounds great, right? Until you realize that I still had 18 babies in school!!!! It was so nice, though. All day, I couldn't help thinking, "THIS is what it should be like EVERYDAY!" There shouldn't be more than 20 kids in a kindergarten class. EVER! We had a delightful day. It's supposed to keep snowing all night, so I'll be curious to see how many come tomorrow.

Only one of the birthday boys came to school today. His mom came up with cupcakes and ice cream in the afternoon. YUM! It was exactly what we needed on day like today.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Wow, is it Wednesday already?

I kept thinking it was Tuesday all day today. Even when the announcement was made this morning to remind us that there was a staff meeting, my first thought was, "What? Today is only Tuesday, not Wednesday." Duh!!! Now that I'm home, I'm actually a little excited about only having two more days to go this week. Yay! You would think that today would have been a drag since Wednesday is one of the days I don't get a prep (=break) but it really wasn't that bad.

I've been a DIBELing fool for the past three days, though, so maybe that's why it's going by so quickly. There isn't a whole lot of "teaching" going on, ya know? Today, Between the Lions was on for a good chunk of the afternoon so I could get some testing done. I hate that I have to do that, but it's seriously the ONLY way I can get it done. Especially since I have no assistant. Years ago, I would be able to at least set up centers and then leave them with the assistant while I sat in the hallway to test my babies in peace and quiet. But, it's only me now, and it is imperative that they are quiet since the whole damn test is oral. If I can't hear what they're saying, what's the point? I'm hoping to finish all the babies by Friday. There really aren't any funny answers to share just yet. A lot of the "funny" ones are repeats of things I've posted in the past, which actually is pretty funny in and of itself.

I did have to call a mommy today. Not usually something I do, but I was at the end of my rope. I think I just had a very limited amount of patience since I'm on a deadline to get this testing done. The little girl whose mom I had to call is pretty new. She was one of the ones who arrived that last week before Christmas break. She was with us for two days, then we were off for three weeks. But, I'll tell ya, both of those two days she was there I gave her older brother messages for mom regarding her behavior. I told him he should talk to his sister while we were on break and explain to her about following rules, etc. Well, here we are, third day back, and things have only gotten worse.

According to the office, she transferred in from another school, which I find hard to believe. Her brother said she didn't go to school before, which I find VERY easy to believe. She has no concept of following rules or routines, she's very disruptive, walks around all day, can't stay on task, can't sit still, calls the other kids names, and today she added pinching to her repertoire! Oh, joy!

I'm hoping to get somewhere with Mom, but something tells me that's not gonna happen. The older brother is almost always out of his classroom because he's in trouble and basically gets thrown out. This is his second year at the Hell-Hole, and I believe he's in 8th grade now. I don't understand why his little sister wouldn't have started in August when he did. That really makes me believe she's just been sitting home and not attending a different school. Come on, why would mom send her kids to two different schools? Makes no sense.

The mother of these two is Latina (I don't know if the dad is black, or if they even have the same dad, but the sister is much darker-skinned that the brother) and the boy looks like a very fair Latino, which has been adding to his problems. Other than him and his sister, there is only one other Latino boy at the Hell-Hole. All of the other students are black. This caused a lot of problems for him last year, and he got into a fight almost daily. This year doesn't seem as bad, but he's still out of his classroom more than he should be. The funny thing is, I've gotten to know him because he's always out of his room. A few times I've volunteered to have him come sit in my room and help me, just so he wouldn't be sitting outside the office all day, doing nothing.

When the mom registered the little sister (with two damn days to go before break!) I was told that she HAD to be in MY class. I don't know if the brother had talked to the mom about me, and she requested me, or what. I really wish they had put her in that K/1 split class. OK, now I'm just being mean. Once all this crazy testing is finished, I'll be able to focus on what she needs and I'll have a bit more patience (I hope!) to work on straightening her out. In the meantime, I told both the mom and the brother that I'll be calling the house everyday, if need be.

Tomorrow, two of my babies are having birthdays. It always cracks me up when kids share a birthday, and I usually tease them about being twins. Hey, maybe we'll be enjoying cupcakes tomorrow! Yum! We're supposed to get some major snow tonight, so it might be a fairly small celebration. I've had 6 kids out everyday so far. Although, not the same 6! Again, that's great since I only have 24 seats!!!

Well, Stud Muffin is whining for me to feed him (who does he think I am, his mother!?) so I'd better sign off for the night. Plus, there are at least four loads of laundry calling my name. Unless I want to go commando tomorrow, I'd better go do it. (yes, I realize four loads doesn't really sound like a lot, but don't forget - there are only 2 people in this house. AND, one of the two hasn't even been home in almost 2 freakin' weeks. So, yeaaaahhhhh....time to do some laundry!)

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Ok, just give me a minute...

...cuz I'm totally wrapped up in the season premier of Biggest Loser. I love this show. I'm just wondering, I the only one who watches this while munching on snacks?

Today was ok. Nothing really exciting to report, which is actually good, cuz that means nothing "bad" happened either. The babies actually had a good day, and earned a marble in their marble jar because I came back from a grade level meeting and "caught them being good." I even sent one of my little darlings home with a note for her mom about what a great day she had. Oh, and smiley face stamps on her hands and cheeks. Thank God for washable markers!! The babies love when I stamp their cheeks. I used to have a pink heart stamp, which was perfect for putting "kisses" on cheeks. Then, one of the little beasts stole it!

Oops, commercial break is over! Gotta go!

Monday, January 4, 2010

OMG!! Somebody PLEASE put me to bed!!!

I just watched this on Oprah (on what, I assume, is a rerun.) I am as far from an Oprah fan as you can get, but the television was on, and the music grabbed my attention. I didn't see this when it originally aired. (cuz, HELLO! I hate Oprah! Well, I don't really like that word, so lets say I dislike her intensely...) As soon as it started, I was hooked. This is seriously cool. Plus, my gorgeous city is the backdrop, so what's not to like?

I have issues...

What the hell is my problem? Why can I not stop obsessing over these guys?!!? Here's tonight's favorites...

Definitely LOVE this one, as I love the Jason Mraz songs they covered, but the sound quality isn't the best here...

OK, I'm well aware of the fact that Christmas is over, but I loved this one because it's done completely "unplugged." No microphones, no recording studio "tweeks," just their awesome voices.

Alright, enough! I HAVE to go to bed! I've been watching SNC videos for over an hour now. Jeez, I'm a loser.....

Well, that wasn't so bad...

The first day back went as well as could be expected. In some regard, it was better than expected because I didn't get any new kids. I thought for sure I would. On the other hand, I didn't have any transfer out, either.

It was rather chilly here in Chitown this morning. When I got up, the weatherman was talking about sub-zero windchills. By the time I left for school, the temperature had climbed all the way up to the single digits. Woo-ha!! Talk about refreshing!!! I was hoping the cold would keep some of the kiddos home this morning (yes, I know I'm an ass, thanks!) but alas, that was not the case. I did get excited when I picked them up this morning because there were only 9 out of the 31 babies there. But, slowly they started trickling in, and by 9:20, there were 24 little darlings there. Thank goodness there were 7 out, because I only have 24 seats in my room!!

The babies were so quiet and subdued when they arrived, I just loved it. That's absolutely typical of the first day back after a break. We made it through the whole morning using our quietest voices. They were a little loud when I picked them up from lunch, but then they settled down pretty quickly for rest time. As expected, most of them fell asleep, and I listened to a symphony of their 'baby snores" while I ate my lunch. It was marvelous!

I was SO happy to see my little TN. I really, really missed him over break. I wanted to take him home with me, and I'd bet my big behind that if I had proposed that to his mom, she would have readily agreed. That's just so sad, isn't it? In my fantasy world, I would take him home and raise him as my own, but then reality bursts that little bubble, and I remember his psycho mother and the crap that is his life. OK, I'm trying to keep this post upbeat, so....moving on....

Time to go appease the loser in me by watching the premier of The Bachelor. I swore I was done with it after last season, but here I am, getting sucked back in again. Geez, there's already somebody crying!! It's the first freakin' night!!! This show is like a bad train wreck. You just can't look away. I'm thinking that the people on this show seem crazier each season because they keep picking the Bachelors and Bachelorettes from the cast-offs of previous seasons. The girls on this season all watched last season, and are under the delusion that they actually know this guy. OMG!! Jillian and Ed just walked in! WTF? Time to go get under my blankie and watch this nonsense in comfort. Night night!!

Sunday, January 3, 2010


I just realized that in about 17 hours, I will be getting up to go BACK TO WORK!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! I don't wanna!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHH!!! I'm going back to bed to cry for a while.......

Friday, January 1, 2010

Happy New Year!

Seriously, I can NOT get enough of these guys!! Happy New Year to all my Bloggy Buddies! May 2010 bring you health, happiness and prosperity!