Narcotics

I'm starting to have a new appreciation for them. I've written, ad nauseam, about my feelings on the subject, so I won't go there again.

However, I've taken more drugs in the last two weeks than I have in my entire life. Literally. I've tried to go without, and skip doses when I can, but ultimately, I've found myself having to fall back on my Norco. Yesterday, I was feeling pretty darn good when I woke up. I actually went to Sam's Club for some groceries and some things my mother needed for dinner, as we were all getting together to celebrate my daddy's birthday. I was doing fine. Right up until dinner was over...

The pain started kicking in right around dessert time. I was hoping it would just hold steady, but naturally, it didn't. It went from 0-60 in about 15 minutes. Sadly, I had to leave the party. CSJ had some Vicodin with him, that he takes for his arthritis, but I knew I had let myself go WAY past the point of no return. I took it before we left, but my parents only live about 2 minutes from me, so I was still in significant pain when I got home. All I could do was go to my room, put my pajamas on and sob. It took a good hour and half for the meds to kick in, and I was just praying I could fall asleep. Not so much.



Sometimes I think my body has the opposite reaction to things. For example, I can drink 2 espressos at my parents' house, then go home and go right to sleep. Another example would be that Vicodin normally knocks people out, but I think it woke me up. I could not fall asleep for the life of me. I was up until almost 2am. That would be fine except I was supposed to go back to work today. Guess who added to her already two-week-long break? I have GOT to go tomorrow, no matter what.

Maybe part of why I couldn't fall asleep was the fact that I couldn't decide what the hell to do about today. I knew there was no way I could work in that kind of pain, but I also knew I couldn't work with the mind-numbing nausea the Norco gives me. It was a damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of situation. Plus, Norco is a narcotic, which means I probably shouldn't be doing a whole lot of driving, right?

I'm thinking maybe part of the reason the pain came back so strongly yesterday is that yesterday was the first day I wore a bra for a whole day since my rash first started. I think I mentioned that the rash is directly under my bra line. Of course it is!! So I've been letting the girls swing in the breeze for a couple of weeks now. Well, it's actually more bounce off my knees than swing in the breeze. (Sorry, boys!) I'm just praying that the bra isn't a problem tomorrow at work. I obviously can NOT go without one, so say a prayer or something for me, will ya?

Believe it or not, I did not take even ONE picture yesterday. I had about 3 weeks of missed time with Monkey to make up for, so I was far too busy lovin' her up to take pictures.

HELP!

Oh, how I wish you could. How I wish ANYONE could! The pain meds aren't doing a damn thing other than making me even more nauseous. Oh, joy. I finally found a couple of positions that don't completely make me scream, so I have been able to nap a little here and there. The nausea and dizziness today are unbelievable. The fucking migraine still hasn't subsided, despite the prescription pain medication. I don't think I'm going to take them anymore.

That's all I can take for now. Reading this computer screen is making my nausea even worse, and I feel like my head is going to explode.

Great, just GREAT!!

I just spent a delightful afternoon in the emergency room.

Let me start from the beginning, since you know how much I like to bore you.

Monday night, as I was getting undressed, I realized I had an itch that felt like a bug bite, right under to band of my bra. I felt around, and sure enough, there was a little bump.

Tuesday, it was itchier than the day before. I asked CSJ to take a look, since now the bump felt like it was "spreading." He said, "Oh, yeah, there's something there alright. It's some kind of rash, I think. The center looks kinda like a pimple, that's coming to a head." Lovely, I know. I still thought it was a bite of some kind, possibly a spider bite. Another thought crossed my mind, but I quickly dismissed it.

You may remember that Tuesday was also the day I pulled a bunch of weeds and dead junk from my yard. That night, the pain in my back started. It was in the same area as the bite, but I didn't think they were at all related.

Wednesday, the migraine woke me up, the back pain was WAY worse, and the rash was spreading. You basically know how the rest of the week went. Friday night, as I was trying to distract myself from the agonizing pain by watching TV, a commercial came on for the very ailment that crossed my mind Tuesday night.

So, I Googled it. Sure enough, I was fairly convinced that I had the right self-diagnoses. I couldn't exactly compare the rash to the photos, since I couldn't see mine. However, everything else seemed to be a match, including the mind-numbing pain, and the headache. I was a little scared, ok, terrified, when I read that sometimes the pain can last up to two months. I knew there was NO way I could deal with that.

This morning, the pain was absolutely unbearable. I decided I needed to go see a doctor. I sobbed through my shower, as well as the whole process of getting dressed. I drove to the nearest immediate care center, only to be told they don't accept my insurance. I was trying to decide if should try and find one associated with my insurance, but I just couldn't take the pain. I went straight to the emergency room. Luckily, they recently instituted a "fast track" system, so I was taken back to a room pretty quickly.

After a while, I sent CSJ a text to let him know where I was. He chastised me for going by myself, but I told him to just finish working, and I'd see him at home later. Instead, he left work and rushed to meet me. The big lug. When he got there, the first thing he did was check the rash. When he opened my gown, he couldn't contain his gasp. "Holy shit! It's WAY bigger now!" Gee, thanks, honey!

Ok, let me fast forward a bit. The doctor finally came in, and did his examination. Well, I was right on with my self-diagnoses. Freakin' SHINGLES!!! Holy crap. He gave me a prescription for a pain medication, and another prescription for an anti-viral medication. He also gave me a note saying that I couldn't go to work next week. Ok, that was kinda sweet.

Unfortunately, that also means I'll be sitting home alone tomorrow for Easter. There's NO way I'm going to take a chance of exposing Monkey to the virus. Plus, my brother is still susceptible to chicken pox. He had such a mild case when he was a child (he literally had THREE pox!) that the doctor told my mother he would probably get them again since his body didn't build up an immunity to the virus.

So, there you go. I just pray that it clears up as quickly as the doctor said (a couple weeks) because I don't know how much more I can take. The pain has started to spread around to the front of my body, and I feel like someone kicked me in my ribs. The doctor said the area looked red, so the rash may be spreading. I hope the medication keeps that from happening.

Speaking of medication, CSJ just walked in the door from picking it up for me, so I guess I'll take it and go lie down. Good night!

FML

For those of you not familiar with one of my favorite sites, FML stands for Fuck My Life. Check it out on my blogroll.

Today is Day 3 of my killer migraine, and the back pain is still excruciating. I haven't gotten out of this bed since we got home from Milwaukee yesterday. I imagine that's probably not helping my back, but sitting or standing only makes it hurt more.

The nausea today was horrendous. I finally had to get up and get myself a glass of ginger ale earlier this morning. I can't really say it worked 100%, but I fell asleep shortly after I drank it, so I guess it doesn't really matter.

Ok, I've absolutely reached my sitting limit. I have to go cry now.

Excruciating

That would accurately describe the pain I've been in since last night. I woke up out of a sound sleep yesterday morning, around 4:30am because my head felt like it was in a vice. It didn't get any better as the day went on, and it carried over to today. On top of that, I was pulling crap in my yard Tuesday, and I think I pulled something in my (already really BAD) back. So, I'm not really sure what was hurting more this morning, my head or my back.

Wait, I didn't get to the best part. We took a little day trip today to Milwaukee to the Milwaukee Art Museum. We really couldn't reschedule since CSJ already took the day off, which for him, is NOT a little thing. Plus, Thursday is the only day that Stud doesn't have school or work, and one of his besties, George, was coming with us since he was off school today. And, today was Target Free First Thursday at the museum, so it would have been a shame to miss that.

So, I had to sit for a very long car ride, which did wonders for my back, then walk for about 10 miles as we checked out every square inch of the museum. (Sweetheart that he is, CSJ dropped me off at the door when we got there, then he and the boys went to park the car in the lot, which was a few blocks away. When we left, I waited in front, while they went to get the car. How sweet is that?) As much as I enjoyed the exhibits, I was in such excruciating pain, I literally had tears sneaking out of my eyes, that I couldn't control. The migraine was making me incredibly nauseous and really dizzy. By the time we left, I was almost crying.

While we drove home, the nausea just continued to get worse and worse. I thought maybe if I could just fall asleep, it would help, but instead, closing my eyes was just adding car sickness nausea to the migraine nausea. Oh, joy! Not to mention, with every bump in the highway, my back was SCREAMING!

If you know me in "real life," you know that I don't really believe in "better living through chemistry." I almost never take any kind of medication. I prefer to let nature take it's course. I labored for 19 hours and birthed a very large baby without drugs. I've had root canals done without drugs (although that has a lot to do with my feeling about needles!). So, yeah, it's pretty rare that I take anything. Well, this morning, before we got in the car, I actually took one of CSJ's pain pills that he takes for his arthritis. I knew the long drive wasn't going to do my back any good. Unfortunately, it didn't even work!! I'm wondering if it may have even contributed to my nausea.

Wow, is anyone still there?! Sorry, I know this is the world's most boring blog post! I actually ended up taking something else when we got home, which, although it didn't take the pain away completely, it certainly has taken the edge off. So, I guess the reduction in pain has made me a little chatty! Type-y? Whatever. Either way, I promise, I'm stopping now. Time to lie down and let CSJ massage my head til I fall asleep. He's good like that. Oh, wait, one other highlight of the day - we stopped on the way up at Cracker Barrel for breakfast. Yay, Cracker Barrel!! Ok, bye.

7/31/11

Well, I survived another month of NaBloPoMo. I always say I'm not going to do it again, but then I see the topic for the next month, and I start to waiver. (BTW, next month's theme is fiction)

Keeping it short again, cuz I'm REALLY feeling bad today. I haven't had cramps like this in a while. Sorry, I know, TMI.

Saturday, July 30

Not feeling so hot today. MAJOR cramps (sorry, boys) and there's a migraine knocking on my door. I've been lying here watching Harry Potter with CSJ for a few hours now. It's kinda nice.

Day 21

Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Do you have a special, non-traditional cure for colds or some other illness? Share it with us.

This prompt made me laugh out loud, given all the whining I've been doing lately about being sick. Obviously, my non-traditional cure is to bitch and moan on my blog, and then not do anything else!!

In all seriousness, I've NEVER been a proponent of the "better living through chemicals/pharmaceuticals" school of thought. It's VERY rare that I take any kind of medication. I've mentioned before that I endured a horrific and long labor, and then birth, without the aide of any drugs. I've had root canals without drugs. I've suffered with migraines nearly my entire life, yet I only deal with them by closing myself in a dark room and/or sleeping. I think you get the picture. I guess my non-traditional cure is to let nature take its course. So far, it's kept me alive for over 4 decades! ;-)

Today's post is brought to you by the letter "M"...

...as in "migraine." Mother-scratchin' migraine, to be exact. (I cleaned that up just for you, Suz. You're welcome.) I was awakened by the piercing, head-splitting pain at about 5 am, and it just got worse from there. This is probably one of the worst I've had in quite some time. It feels like someone stabbed me through the top of my head with a white-hot poker. My teeth hurt. My eye feels like it's going to burst. On the pain scale of 1-10, this is about a 9. I've been trying to stay in the dark, asleep, most of this afternoon. Dorky Dog actually just woke me up because he needed to go outside. Thankfully, it's dark outside now. When I crawled into bed several hours ago, it was VERY bright and sunny outside, which only made things worse. Now that I'm awake, maybe I should actually consider feeding my child. Hmmm.... Is pouring milk into a bowl of cereal acceptable?