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Showing posts with label holiday humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label holiday humor. Show all posts
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Thursday, December 23, 2010
A little holiday humor...
I just stole this from Ricochet who I think stole it from someone else. Wherever it came from, it made me laugh, so I'm sharing it with you. You're welcome!
Monday, December 20, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I love the way...
...the internet and modern technology has made the world so big and so small at the same time. The Blogosphere is an interesting and wonderful place. I guess some people (my Bestest Friend, for example...) would think it sounds strange for me to say I've made some awesome friends there! And, I really do think of these people as my friends.
Last year, because I was too lazy to bring in all my boxes of ornaments from the garage, my tree was a little sparse. But, then I had a brainstorm. I decided to put the Christmas cards I received on my tree as a cute way to display them, as well as an easy way to dress up my tree. This year, I decided to do the same thing, since it was so cute last year. This is what the tree looks like so far.
What the hell does that have to do with my Bloggy Buddies, you ask? Well, look at who's dressing up my tree so far this year...
Ok, this one isn't from a Bloggy Buddy, but I just had to share. This adorable card was send to me by my cousin and his boyfriend. About a year and a half or so ago they adopted these two adorable dachshunds, Max and Molly, who are senior puppies. If you can't actually see the card, be sure to click on it so it enlarges and you can read it. My cousin is a goofball!
It just occurred to me that the three Bloggy Buddies above are probably the three people who will love this card the most! But, you're all free to enjoy it. :)
I also received some holiday greetings from another Bloggy Buddy, Clippy Mat. But, sadly, she didn't put her pretty mug on the card, which is why I didn't show you the card. It's ok, Clippy, I already know how gorgeous you are!!
Let me reiterate the point of this post. Thanks to the magic of the interwebs, my circle of friends has expanded to include some awesome people that I never in a million years would have met otherwise. And, I'm ever so thankful that it has. I love my Bloggy Buddies! I truly think of you as my friends, even those I have yet to meet 'in real life.' I guess that's part of the beauty of the Blogosphere. You get such a deep, intimate look into people's lives (as deep and intimate as they'd like you to see) that you feel 'bonded,' despite never laying eyes on each other, never sitting in the same room, never chatting over a cup of coffee, etc. Your Bloggy Buddies help you see that you're 'normal,' and the crazy things that happen in your life happen in most people's lives, as well. Your Bloggy Buddies are there to offer words of encouragement and love when you need them. Your Bloggy Buddies give you a shoulder to cry on when you need it. Your Bloggy Buddies sometimes make you laugh hard enough to wet your pants (WHAT?!? I'm old and have a weak bladder!) You get the point. Let me say it one more time...I LOVE MY BLOGGY BUDDIES!!!
Oh, one more thing. My 'real life' friends, Jake and Leslie, are on an amazing journey right now, and could use some prayers. Click over and read all about it.
Last year, because I was too lazy to bring in all my boxes of ornaments from the garage, my tree was a little sparse. But, then I had a brainstorm. I decided to put the Christmas cards I received on my tree as a cute way to display them, as well as an easy way to dress up my tree. This year, I decided to do the same thing, since it was so cute last year. This is what the tree looks like so far.
What the hell does that have to do with my Bloggy Buddies, you ask? Well, look at who's dressing up my tree so far this year...My friend Smiley's two furbabies, Wrigs and Chum.
Ok, this one isn't from a Bloggy Buddy, but I just had to share. This adorable card was send to me by my cousin and his boyfriend. About a year and a half or so ago they adopted these two adorable dachshunds, Max and Molly, who are senior puppies. If you can't actually see the card, be sure to click on it so it enlarges and you can read it. My cousin is a goofball!
It just occurred to me that the three Bloggy Buddies above are probably the three people who will love this card the most! But, you're all free to enjoy it. :)I also received some holiday greetings from another Bloggy Buddy, Clippy Mat. But, sadly, she didn't put her pretty mug on the card, which is why I didn't show you the card. It's ok, Clippy, I already know how gorgeous you are!!
Let me reiterate the point of this post. Thanks to the magic of the interwebs, my circle of friends has expanded to include some awesome people that I never in a million years would have met otherwise. And, I'm ever so thankful that it has. I love my Bloggy Buddies! I truly think of you as my friends, even those I have yet to meet 'in real life.' I guess that's part of the beauty of the Blogosphere. You get such a deep, intimate look into people's lives (as deep and intimate as they'd like you to see) that you feel 'bonded,' despite never laying eyes on each other, never sitting in the same room, never chatting over a cup of coffee, etc. Your Bloggy Buddies help you see that you're 'normal,' and the crazy things that happen in your life happen in most people's lives, as well. Your Bloggy Buddies are there to offer words of encouragement and love when you need them. Your Bloggy Buddies give you a shoulder to cry on when you need it. Your Bloggy Buddies sometimes make you laugh hard enough to wet your pants (WHAT?!? I'm old and have a weak bladder!) You get the point. Let me say it one more time...I LOVE MY BLOGGY BUDDIES!!!
Oh, one more thing. My 'real life' friends, Jake and Leslie, are on an amazing journey right now, and could use some prayers. Click over and read all about it.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Email of the Day
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The man from New York fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.
The man from California reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."
Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."
The man from Las Vegas started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"
The man from Vegas replied, "These are Carols."
"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The man from New York fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.
The man from California reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."
Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."
The man from Las Vegas started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"
The man from Vegas replied, "These are Carols."
Monday, October 25, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Ultimate Peep Show
Yes, this is a repeat. This is now the third Easter season that I've posted this. But, come on, you KNOW it still makes you giggle!! Thanks again, Jen, for letting me steal it from you so many years ago!Monday, November 30, 2009
So, I had a few free moments tonight...
I actually wasted over 30 minutes last night making 5 different videos like this, mostly starring just Stud Muffin, that I thought I was posting here. Apparently, I was doing it wrong, but I accidentally figured it out just now. So, enjoy this one, starring Stud, my nieces, my brother and my sister. Be warned, I may just go back and post the other 5 later....
(Ok, apparently, when I added this text, it somehow screwed up the video, so I had to post the text as a separate post. I think I'll skip posting the rest of them, since it's a pain in the butt!)
(Ok, apparently, when I added this text, it somehow screwed up the video, so I had to post the text as a separate post. I think I'll skip posting the rest of them, since it's a pain in the butt!)
Friday, November 13, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Happy Valentine's Day, My Bloggy Buddies!
Valentine's Day used to always be such a big deal to "us" when CSJ was around. His birthday was yesterday, so we always made a week of it. I always made him a heart-shaped cake that said, "Happy Birthday to My Valentine." The first year, we had been dating for 2 months, and man, I went ALL out! I borrowed some cake pans from my mom's friend and made a TIERED heart-shaped 4-layer cake. WTF?! It took me a full day. That lasted for years, and even though it eventually just became a standard two-layer heart-shaped cake, the message was always the same. Once my son was old enough to "help," he took over the decorating part, I just baked the cake (still heart-shaped. What can I say, I love those pans.)This year, I didn't even bother. This is his first birthday since marrying HWW, and I wasn't sure how it would go over with her. I have no idea why I give a shit, since she had absolutely NO problem causing turmoil in OUR marriage, but whatever. I'm too old for this shit, and I don't want to have to deal with any crap, ya know? Besides, if Studly had asked, I would have done it, but he didn't say a thing about it, so screw it. Stud Muffin actually stayed home last night, and hung out with his two best friends. (He and his one friend are still snoring away, and it's after 11:00!) It seems his father didn't really care, either, since he has a new wife to celebrate with him. So, actually, I'm the one who made out, cuz I got to hang out with my three favorite boys all night! I picked the other two up right after school, and we had blast.
Studly is going to a Valentine's Day dance tonight with "the girl." I can't stand that he's gone from being a baby to being a man in about a minute and a half. I'm letting CSJ handle tonight completely on his own. I'll be at work, anyway. Apparently, he took it upon himself to go out and buy a ton of things for Stud Muffin to give to "the girl" for Valentine's Day. Luckily, Stud Muffin isn't into all that mushy crap just yet (and neither is "the girl") so he told his dad to take it all back. All he wanted to give her was a rose. I hope they have fun tonight. It'll be the first dance he'll be going to without his posse, since this dance is for couples. I hope he loosens up and actually dances.
I came across this hilarious page, and thought I'd share it with you. It's called If Valentine's Day Cards Told the Truth. Too funny! Enjoy!
After a week of warm weather (Ok, warm to us!) it snowed last night. Only about an inch, but enough to be kind of annoying. Dorky Dog is at the groomer's right now, and all I keep thinking is that he's going to come out, want to run around in the snow/mud, and I'll have wasted the $50 they charge me to bathe and brush him. Ah, well, I hope they at least give him a Valentine bandanna tied around his neck. If they do, I'll come back later and share a picture.
I think it's time to wake up the boys. Stud Muffin wants to go to the store and get some new pants for the dance tonight, so we'd better get going since I have to leave for the bar in just over 4 hours. Ugh! I'm already tired just thinking about it...
I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon. ~Author Unknown
We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love. ~Author Unknown
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? ~Author Unknown
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
This just stolen...
Here are a couple of things I lifted from one of the DJs over at The Lite. This video is really neat, and a great idea for being green this Christmas, or anytime.
Furoshiki gift wrapping from RecycleNow on Vimeo.
This made me laugh out loud at a few of these.
Tips for the Holidays
1) Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2) Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You can't find it any other time of the year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3) If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4) As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5) Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6) Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7) If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8) Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9) Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10) One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
Have a great holiday season!
Thanks, Kevin!
Furoshiki gift wrapping from RecycleNow on Vimeo.
This made me laugh out loud at a few of these.
Tips for the Holidays
1) Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.
2) Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You can't find it any other time of the year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!
3) If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4) As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5) Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6) Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7) If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.
8) Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9) Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10) One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"
Have a great holiday season!
Thanks, Kevin!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Illinois' Official Christmas Carol
"Get packin', Rod Blagojevich,"
by John McHugh
(to the tune of "God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen")
***
Get packin', Rod Blagojevich
The state's in disarray
The Tribune wants you unemployed
At least by Christmas Day.
The TV pundits want your head
Could there be pay to play?
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy
Save Illinois!
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy.
***
Good riddance, Rod Blagojevich
Your Elvis look's inane,
The Senate's mad, so's Lisa's dad.
You drive us all insane.
Our transit's broke, the state's a joke,
The Tollway's one big pain.
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy
Save Illinois!
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy.
***
Good luck, old Rod Blagojevich
The feds have quite a place.
Fitzgerald's poked his nose around
And if he has a case,
George Ryan's moving stuff around
Creating extra space.
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy
Save Illinois!
Oh, tidings of comfort and joy.
Thanks, Peppy, for emailing this to me! It cracked me up!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
This was one of the emails from my daddy today. It cracked me up!
(I hope this little video doesn't offend any of you, as that's not my intention.)
A little DIBELS giggle from today:
The picture choices were window, raisins, bell and something I can't remember.
Me: Which picture starts with /w/?
Glasses: Waisins! (Of course, this little darling has a bit of a speech impediment, and always says it that way!)
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