Christmas Catch-Up

Ok, full disclosure - this post is just going to be a bunch of pictures of my Monkey, and a couple more pictures just for fun.

Me and Niece #1

Me and Niece #2

This is how Monkey arrived at Grandma and Grandpa's house.  How freakin' cute is that coat?!

Monkey in her pretty Christmas dress.

My sweet brother bought this for me for Christmas.  

Naturally, I filled it with his favorite dessert, Taffy Apple Salad.

Me and my Monkey!!

She was looking at her daddy, and posing for a picture.  I just think the look on her face is priceless!

Well, that's it for now.  I'll spare you the 354 other pictures I took that night, and the hours of video.  You're welcome.

Little side note - naturally, the first places I always lose weight are my face and breasts.  The face thing I like, since people then think I've lost more than I have.  The boob thing, not so much.  They were already saggin' to my knees (sorry, boys!) and now they're really bad.  Although, I am VERY happy that I can get back into some of my favorite Victoria's Secret bras that haven't fit me in years.  Yay!  I've been saying I was going to get a breast lift for at least 15 years now.  Sadly, until I get a job, that's just going to be a far-off dream.  In the meantime, I'll just let Victoria hold them in place.

Anyway, where I was really going with this is that now my chin is back to being what we refer to in our family as the "chin of sin."  We all have the same pointy chin, which I noticed when I was looking at the pictures of myself with my three beautiful nieces.  Monkey's doesn't really show yet, but it's only a matter of time. =)

I made the leap...

...and started a second blog!  I decided I love you guys too much to bore with the minutia of my struggle to shrink my ass.  But, if you're really interested, you can check out the details over there.  I decided to be really original and creative, and named it Operation Shrink-My-Ass.  Classy, I know.

I will be keeping the ticker on this blog, though, to help keep myself accountable.

After being bitterly disappointed by no storm yesterday, this is what I woke up to today.

(Please ignore the white trashy-ness of my deck at the moment!)

I mean, SERIOUSLY?!  That's not snow!!  I guess I'll have to take what I can get. 

I called it...

Yep, I got to spend the day with my Monkey!!!  Her mom called me while I was at the gym.  (More about that in a second.)  She's just so damn cute, it almost makes me want to cry.  We had a very busy day.

Magnum and I cut our visit to the gym short after finding out Monkey was ours for the day.  I dropped him off at the house, and headed off to pick her up.  After picking her up from her mommy, we rushed back to my house and had just enough time to change her out of her jammies and into her clothes before my sister and niece showed up.  We drove them to the train, so they could head downtown for work, then headed out to Sam's Club.  It was time to get Monkey a Big Girl car seat!  She definitely outgrew the one I had.  We were at Sam's for over an hour, and she was an angel the entire time.  It never ceases to amaze me when perfect strangers go out of their way to come over and tell me how beautiful she is.  And, she's just so darn friendly, saying "Hi!" to anyone and everyone.  Ugh, I just LOVE her!!!!

From Sam's we headed to my in-laws' to drop off the Ensure I picked up for my FIL.  Monkey has been spending lots of time there lately, since Magnum is there 7 days a week now, taking care of his father.  My MIL gets such a kick out of my Monkey.  Duh, who doesn't!?

Unfortunately for me, Monkey's mommy decided to leave work early today.  (We were supposed to have a MAJOR storm hit around 3pm this afternoon)  I ended up having her about an hour and a half less than I usually do.  Poop.

By the way, we're still waiting for the storm.  After breaking a record for the longest time without a measurable snowfall here in Chicago (a snow drought, if you will) we were promised today was going to be the day.  Like I said, they kept predicting the snow would start around 3, and we were going to get 3-4 inches.  Well, it's now 8pm, and not a flake in sight.  Guess who's one pissed off penguin.

You didn't think I was going to leave without some pictures, now did you?  Not a chance!

So, this morning, when I picked her up, Monkey had on her fleecy, footie pajamas, as usual.  However, she was also wearing her boots on her feet.  They are her newest obsession.  Her mom said she wouldn't leave the house without putting them on over her pjs.

When it was time to get dressed, I put these two choices in front of her, and asked her which ones she wanted to wear.  Surprise, surprise, she grabbed her boots, and tried to put them on all by her big self.

 A couple of weeks ago, Magnum and I picked up this cute shirt for her.  Turns out, someone had given her mom the same one.  She actually wore this when she went to take her picture with Santa.  (Stay tuned for that disaster!)

 I was trying to get her dressed to leave the house so we could head to the train station, but she wanted to dance instead.  Of course, by the time I figured out how the hell to get the video going on my phone, most of the cutest stuff was over.

 Ok, so she went to see Santa the other day with her mommy and daddy.  Um, I don't think she liked him.  What do you think?

 I promise you, this baby NEVER cries!!  She is seriously the happiest baby you'd ever want to meet.  When my brother sent me this, I literally almost started crying.  I hate it, but I know when she's a teenager, we'll all be laughing about it.

I thought I had shared these, but I see I didn't.  My brother and I went to lunch the other day with Monkey, who was being her usual cute self. 

At one point, while I was sharing my lunch with her, she reached up and took my glasses off my face, and put them on.  Cutest little nerd I've ever seen!!!

About two seconds after this, her mom sent my brother a text, asking what the baby was up to.  My brother sent her one of these pictures, and wrote, "She doing my taxes."  I thought it was funny, as did Monkey, who laughs like a hyena anytime someone laughs.  Her mommy, however, did NOT think it was funny.  She immediately sent back a text saying, "That not good for her eyes!!"  Yikes, we were in the doghouse. 

I didn't forget about the gym thing.  The short story is that Magnum and I joined a new gym that just opened near our house.  I couldn't pass up the super deal ($10 a month!) and I figured, what the hell else do I have to do all day?  So far, I've only taken advantage of the fancy treadmills they have.  I've been doing an hour a day (well, 65 minutes, including cool down.  Every minute counts!!).  I'm contemplating documenting what I do at the gym publicly, to hold myself more accountable, but I know none of you want to read that crap.  I'm thinking maybe I'll start another blog solely for this purpose.  What do you think?

I'm trying not to be annoyed by the fact that I seem to have hit a wall for some reason.  Today was the first time in about a week and half that I was able to update my ticker, and it's only by 1 measly pound.  I know I shouldn't be discouraged, but it's hard not to be, especially now that I've been hitting the gym every freakin' morning.  I'm going to have to make a concerted effort to get in a Tae Bo tape later in the day, I think.

Whew, I don't think I've done a post this long in ages.  I'm exhausted!  Ok, not really, but I need to go empty the dishwasher.  Hopefully, the world won't end tomorrow, and I'll be able to check in on all of you!  Good night. =)

So, today I...

...managed to finally start making some holiday yummies.

Rolo Pretzel M&M thingies.  

I've seen these called Reindeer Bellybuttons, among other things, but we just call them delish! 

Cake Batter Fudge

Dark Chocolate Fudge

 M&M Sugar Cookies
I think I should have put more M&Ms in there.  Actually, I should have mixed them into the batter, instead of just pressing a few on top.
Before:

After:

In between, I took my sweet neighbor, Jean, to the ear doctor to get her hearing aid checked out.  I came home, made dinner, and then whipped up the sugar cookies after dinner.  I've got a hair appointment tonight, so my girlfriend (who owns the salon) will be getting a big tin filled with an assortment of all these goodies. 

I'll start the "real" baking tomorrow.  At least that's the plan.  Secretly, I'm hoping to get that much-anticipated phone call asking me to take Monkey for the day!

Dancing Machine

My brother just emailed this to me. Enjoy!

Email of the Day

I don't even have to tell you who sent me this, right?

I'm sending this out to every person I know who is Italian, could be Italian , married an Italian, lived with Italians or wants to be Italian...... !

Let's start at the beginning. Come stai? Molto bene. Bon giorno. Ciao. Arrivederci. Every Italian from Italy knows these words and every Italian-American should.

But what about the goomba speech pattern? Those words and phrases that are a little Italian, a little American, and a little slang. Words Every paesano and Bacciagaloop has heard,-words we hear on The Sopranos and throughout our Little Italy neighborhoods of Chicago New York and New Jersey. This form of language, the "Goomba-Italiano" has been used for generations. It's not gangster slang terms like "whack" or "vig", if that's what you are thinking---nope, this is real guido talk !

The goomba says ciao when he arrives or leaves. He says Mama Mia anytime emotion is needed in any given situation. Mannaggia, meengya, oofah, and of course, va fongool can also be used. Capeesh?
He uses a mopeen to wipe his hands in the cucina , gets agita from the gravy (SAUCE to the Chicago gang) and will shkeeve meatballs unless they are homemade from the famiglia. Always foonah your bread in the pot of gravy (sauce ) or you will be considered a real coo-gootz or a Mezzo-finookio . There are usually plenty of mamalukes and the girl from the neighborhood with the reputation is a facia-bruta, puttana or a schifosa.
If you are called cattivo, cabbadost, sfatcheem, stupido, or strunz , you are usually a pain in the ass A crazy diavlo can give you the malokya (evil eye), but that red horn (contra malokya) will protect you if you Use it right. Don't forget to always say per favore and grazia and prego .

If you are feeling mooshadda or stoonad or mezzo-morto, always head to Nonna's and she will fix you up with a little homemade manicott', cavadell', or calamar ', or some ricotta cheesecake.
Mangia some zeppoles, canollis, torrone, struffoli, shfoolyadell', p ignoli cookies, or a little nutella on pannetone. Delizioso ! I think I will fix myself a sangweech of cabagol ' with some proshoot and mozarell' or maybe just a hot slice of peetza ...............

So salud ' if you have any Italian blood in you and you understood anything written here! Then, you are numero uno and a professore of the goombas .

If you don't get any of this, then fa Nabola with the whole thing and you are a disgraziato. Scuzi, mia dispiachay, I didn't mean that....... Just......

fugheddaboudit !

Email of the Day

Of course, like most of my "Email of the Day" emails, my Daddy sent me this.  I thought it was pretty neat.

Rejected Hallmark Cards?

I was going through my email files, and cleaning them up a bit, when I came across this email a friend sent me, oh, gee, let's see...LAST MARCH!!!  I had saved it specifically to share with all my Bloggy Buddies, but somehow, I never got around to it.  Well, it cracked me up all over again when I opened it, so here it is.  Enjoy!

Not that anyone gives a hoot...

...but I had to find a new ticker because the old site I was using has been on the fritz for days.  I haven't been able to update it, which is not good for my morale.  Actually, I think I like this one better anyway. =)

Trying to keep focused on the positive...

...which most of you already know means my Monkey!

I had her again yesterday (YAY!) and we had a lovely day.  On the days I have her, I meet her mother at her workplace, which is about 10 minutes from my house.  It works out perfectly for both of us.

Driving home after picking her up, this was the adorable sight in my rear-view mirror.

 I love that she's still in her jammies when I get her.  It means I usually get a little snuggle time with her when we get to my house.

Yesterday, she decided to spend some quality time gamin' it up with her cousin.  I was cracking up at how serious she was.  She was watching Stud's fingers like a hawk, trying to figure out what he was going with his controller.

 I love that she thinks SHE'S causing the action on the TV screen.  Too cute!

 When we finally made our way upstairs to get dressed, I was pulling out clothes and a diaper, when I heard the most glorious belly laugh.  She had found my glasses on the bed, and put them on.  I tried to snap a picture WITHOUT her hands in the way, but the glasses kept slipping off her face. :(

 We actually drove all the back to where her mommy and daddy live because I was meeting a friend for lunch.  Monkey fell asleep about half-way through the drive, and then proceeded to take a two hour nap!  My girlfriend and I enjoyed every minute of our lunch and chit-chat. 

When she finally woke up, she was feeling very mushy and needed to cuddle for a bit.  My friend couldn't help but pull out her phone and snap lots of pictures of that beautiful face.  She took this one of us, which I thought was pretty cute.  I'm glad she did, too.  Since I'm always the one TAKING the tons of pictures of her, I don't really have many of the two of us together. 

 Wow, what a difference from the very first time we took her to a restaurant, huh?  

 

She was exactly one week old here, and we all met for lunch before her one-week checkup at the pediatrician's office.  

(I debated for a long time about using the hideous photo of myself.  If you didn't know better, you would swear I was the one who had just given birth!  I don't know what the hell was going on, but I'm a hot mess!!  Actually, now that I think about it, I believe it was literally 110 degrees that day.  I'm pretty sure I posted about it.  Anyway, I decided to use this one because you can really see how teeny tiny Monkey was then.  She basically fit in one hand!)

After about 10-15 minutes of snuggles, Monkey was ready to eat.  Here's her absolute favorite thing to eat lately!

Well, that was a little glimpse into my fun day yesterday.  We ended up being at that restaurant for almost FOUR hours!!  (We were at Cracker Barrel, so I can spend 4 hours there any day of the week!)  At about Hour 3, my brother came strolling in to join us, and then decided to order food, which kept us there almost another hour.  But, we had a great time, which is all that matters!